Does my child need counseling?

A common question from parents who call me is “does my child need counseling?”. This is an “it depends” answer. Some tips that can help to guide your decision are:

Yes, my child needs counseling if:

1. Their symptoms have not improved with time
2. Support people in their life have not been able to help with the issue
3. Your child is asking to come to counseling
4. Your child expresses a desire to harm themselves or someone else. If this is the case, please seek immediate help and psychiatric evaluation. Do not wait to get in with a therapist. A list of resources can be found here.
5. There is an increase in concerning behaviors (withdrawal, isolation, loss of interest in activities, behavioral issues or acting out at home or school)

If none of these apply, ask yourself:

1. Is my child improving on their own with whatever they had been struggling with?
2. Does my child have supports in their life (family, friends, adults in the community) who are a good source of help and comfort?
3. Has my child has clearly stated they are not willing to go to counseling?
4. I don’t have any warning signs or indicators that my child is at risk for harming self or others.
5. If any of these apply, it may be okay to monitor what is going on. If you are unsure, please consult with your child’s physician or you can call and have a consultation with me to see if your child may benefit from counseling.

Please keep in mind that counseling is unlikely to harm your child. It may take talking to more than one person to find a good fit for your child and family, and that’s okay. Sometimes children will improve on their own over time, and sometimes they won’t. This is no different from adults. If you as their parent or caregiver seem to be struggling more than your child is with a situation, you can come instead of your child so you can have support.